I've also never seen goat porn but am guessing I wouldn't pick either for t.v night.
 |
| (I don't think we are doing this right, do you?) |
I have seen the Duggars in action and kind of view them like I'd view E.T.
Cute on t.v. but I'd probably pee myself if any of them showed up at my door.
 |
| (Hmm, nice and chunky..he'd be good in a stew) |
I try to picture what it would be like for some poor bastard trying to forewarn them about some of the things they might see when their away from Ma and Pa Duggar.
 |
| (Is everyone here?) (I don't know, it was your turn to count them) |
Try explaining the Jersey Shore show to the Duggar kids.
Hi everybody, this is a show called Jersey Shore.
“Oh,
did that poor girl get beaten because she is a lady of the evening?”
“Nope, that's
Snookie and thats just her normal makeup”
“I
like Sesame Street too!”
“No, it's
Snookie not Cookie”
“Umm..who
is that?”
“He is called
'the situation'.”
“Umm...why
would his parents call him that?”
“He gave
himself that name”
“So
how do you call him? Do you say 'excuse me, Mr. The Situation'?”
“ I don't think
that anyone in Jersey ever says 'excuse me'.”
“But
what do they say if they're wrong or bumps into someone?”
“They never
think they are wrong in Jersey and would probably beat you in front
of cameras if you bumped into you.”
Minute
pause
“May
I go back to praying now?”
Or trying to explain the Duggars to the Jersey Shore cast.
“Who's that, a new gang?”
“No, its just one family”
“Who
is that guy that is always around?”
“That is what
they call a 'father'.”
“Hunh,
but what's he doing there?”
“He lives
there”
“On
his days with the kids...”
“No, no all the
time.”
“Well,
what is he saying to all those kids?”
“It's called
'talking' to them.”
“But
I can barely hear him!”
“He isn't
yelling.”
“But
how do they know which one he is talking to?”
“He says their
name and before you ask, yes he does know them all.”
“Okay,
wait. What's that thing under their head?”
“That would be
their neck”
“Why
would they leave the back of their heads exposed like that though?
The father will have no problem cuffing them now.”
“He doesn't hit
them.”
“Ooh,lost
his arms in Iraq?”
“No, he just
doesn't hit them”
“But
then what do they bitch to their friends about in school?”
“They don't go
to school, they're homeschooled.”
“But
where do they go to show off their abs or new D&G skirt?
“They aren't
allowed to show off their abs and almost all of their clothes are
second hand.”
“Second
hand..? Does this have something to do with their fathers arms not
working?”
“No, their
father lives with them,his arms work, he doesn't hit them upside the
head, they are homeschooled and they can't wear clothes that expose
anything.”
 |
| (Is this a drinking game?) |
Confused
silence.
“Turn
this off, I dont like these freaks who all want to be build homes and
have a second hand under their clothes.”
“No, no! They
are schooled at home not about homes....ugh, nevermind.”
After rereading this post, am feeling bad for the poor goats so am sending them video of Debbie does Dallas to give them a clue.
Great now picturing goats in cheerleading uniforms._
"
Dear God. My brain is bleeding...
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